weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
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