She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
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