So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
Omg. I'm living macklemores best life. I have someone's granddads dog, I'm about to have someone's grandmas car. I look incredible.
Randomize