let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
Randomize
