Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize
