everytime i eat a fruit i feel like i'm eating ovaries
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
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