There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
Had dinner with a married woman but didn't have sex with her. Tweeted at Mike Pence to apologize anyway.
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
Randomize
