I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
I'm actually glad the whole thing's over now. It's exhausting to fake a pregnancy.
Imagine not having to fake it.
Yeah, I should never have kids, probably.
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
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