sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
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