one might say we're banned from that church
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
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