The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
