did i leave my keys in your car? BTW: sorry for throwing that drink on your date.
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
Promise me, at my funeral, you will re-enact our human sledding incident of 2011....you can use my dead body as said sled.
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
Randomize
