if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
Randomize