Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
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