Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
Randomize