Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
I have never pre-planed for a better sober morning than lacing my muffin batch with tylenol.
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
Based on my calculations, I should be blackout by approximately 11:14pm and that's when I need you to take my phone away from me. Mkay?
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
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