I dont know whether to be proud of myself for not driving, or being proud that i was so messed up I couldnt drive
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
Randomize
