Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
I unwillingly was the ball between four hungry hippos last night. I thought the one chick was actually going to eat me
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
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