is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
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