So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
You were on the drunk bus swinging around on the pole when you decided you were hungry, so you pulled half a bagel out of your pants and ate it. Everyone stared at you, dumbfounded as to where it came from, and cheered
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize
