It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
Can someone please remind me later tonight that there's a taco in my purse. I may get drunk and forget I put it there
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
there is another microwave in the elevator.
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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