Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
Randomize
