shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Randomize
