I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
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