Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
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