Will you take my knitting needle, stick it far up my nose, reach in my frontal lobe and give it a few swirls?
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
My mom is currently out with her lesbian friends and I'm home alone drunk listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack. WHY DO I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPETE WITH HER?
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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