and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
Dude, this old lady messaged me on Facebook talking about her grandson and wanted to know shit about me. I'd almost call her a cougar except she looks like mashed potatoes that have come alive.
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
Randomize
