yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize