if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
You filled up my voicemail with a slurred but graphic depiction of how you were humping a fire hydrant.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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