Just chased the kids into the backyard with kitchen knives. Best. Babysitters. Ever.
i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
Randomize