you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
Randomize
