Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
Randomize
