There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
Randomize
