On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
The lady at the touchless car wash just gave me the look of death. How do I say, "sorry it's not my puke" in Spanish?
Either I'm drunk or judge Judy has 3D commercials...so I think I'm drunk. Also I may or may not haven eaten a hoagie on the toilet when I didn't want to stand up
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
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