just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
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