So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
Measuring your booze intake in glasses is like measuring Rosie O'Donnell's weight in ounces.
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
he laminated a picture of his dick.
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
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