just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
Randomize
