I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
