this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
Is it bad that when someone says the phrase "helicopter dick" I immediately think of you?
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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