im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
can we get nightvision for the apartment?
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
