I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
i would one night stand the shit outta him
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
Randomize
