When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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