her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
Quick, to the slutcave!
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
Come share oat with me in your robe
Those nachos came to me in a dream
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
Randomize
