Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
THE EAGLE HAS MY PANTIES. I REPEAT. THE FUCKING MASCOT HAS MY PANTIES.
HOLY SHIT. You're my hero.
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
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