Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
