she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
I just queefed in yoga class and now the old man next to me is smiling at me.
I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
Randomize
