Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
checking your phone to see who you drunk dialed last night isnt as funny when you see you had a 17 minute call to your dad.
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
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