As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
she smelled like a LAN party
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
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