he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
Randomize
