shes about as inviting as chlamydia
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
Damn victory sex feels great
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
Randomize