Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
Randomize
