if i'm ever as drunk as the girl in front of me... kill me.
I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
I think pants incapable of making pants work
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Randomize
